Although the weather here now is more like late November, the cinematic offerings at the local théâtre would suggest that summer is already upon us! Last night, M-Em and L-Shep and I went to see the newest release in the venerable history of the Star Trek franchise.
Disclaimers: I've never been a Trekkie (Trekker?), but enjoyed the original series enough when I was a kid, and briefly paid attention to a couple of seasons of the Next Generation on television when I was in college. Also, the older I get, the less able I am to enjoy much of anything that comes out of Hollywood. It takes a lot for me to suspend disbelief these days.
For what it was, the latest Star Trek was cute and fun. On the Sweet Pickles scale of film criticism, I'd give it a solid "well-it-didn't-make-my-ass-hurt." If you haven't seen it yet, you can probably read on without worrying about me spoiling any surprises, because you've already seen this story dozens of times with only slight variations...
CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT:
Rakishly handsome young rebel-without-a-cause (let's call him "Maverick") in danger of wasting his father's heroic legacy, until wake-up call from elder statesman (let's call him "Viper") familiar with dad's apotheosis channels the daredevil's energies, setting the young buck on a course of personal growth from lovable poon-hound to leader of men.
Frigid young prodigy of whom great things are expected (let's call him "Ice Man") torn between two worlds, wrestles with inner demons to learn his own limitations and eventually concede submission to the more potent testosterone of his ne'er-do-well nemesis-turned-BFF.
Agitated and earnest young med student with charmingly foul mouth (let's call him "Goose") who forms early bond with our spirited ne'er-do-well, matures from protective partner-in-crime to become the perfect wingman.
Confident and sassy young language expert whose hotness leads those around her to underestimate her genius (let's call her "Charlie"), maintains confrontational facade with young hero in order to prove herself in a man's world, which only fuels his interest in doing sexy times with her.
SETTING:
Apparently, in the future, all human activity takes place along precarious edges at dizzying heights.
SCRIPT - A SAMPLE DIALOGUE:
Maverick: "What can I say, bro... I'm a badboy." [crooked grin]
Goose: "Dammit, Maverick! That badboy attitude of yours is going to get us kicked out of Star Fleet Academy! Or killed!"
Ice Man: [raises eyebrow]
Charlie: "You may be a badboy, but I know the square root of pi."
Maverick: "As the cadet with the largest penis, I am now in control of this vessel."
Comic Relief #1 (Asian): [drops something]
Comic Relief #2 (Celt): [makes wisecrack]
Goose: "You can't do this... think of your career! But if I can't talk some sense into your thick skull... what can I do to help?"
Ice Man: [cites relevant statistic about penis measurements]
Charlie: [side-eyed glance, then huffs off sexily...cue music: En Vogue's "Never Gonna Get It"]
Comic Relief #3 (Slav): "Wessel!"
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